


Stu-Pot is a Bad Driver

by TheGeekySquirrel



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Breakups, Drugs Made Them Do It, F/M, Forgive Me, He's gonna be an asshole when he wakes up, Murdoc's in a Coma, No swears, Oops I Lied, Other, Role Reversal, Unhealthy Relationships, Why Did I Write This?, poorly written accents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-01
Updated: 2017-06-19
Packaged: 2018-10-26 17:40:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 9,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10791495
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGeekySquirrel/pseuds/TheGeekySquirrel
Summary: What if Murdoc hadn't decided to be an asshole that day back in 1997? What if Stuart had been the one to crash a car into a store, putting the other in a coma?This is how it may have happened, had that been the case.Completed!





	1. The Couch

Stuart woke up in an ambulance, feeling like shit. The pills were still clouding his mind, but he still felt pain on the right side of his head. There’s someone moving around to his left, but they stop when they notice his open eyes. 

 

“Oh fuck, your eye.”

 

He stares at them for a minute, confused. Then, he remembers what happened. 

 

“Did I hurt anyone?”

 

The paramedic nods, “Only one guy. Can I get your name, sir?”

 

“Stuart. Stuart Pot.”

 

The paramedic nods and grabs a clipboard to write on, “Alright, we’ll be at the hospital in a minute, Mr. Pot.”

 

“Y’said somefink about me eye. Wos wrong wif me eye?”

 

“I’m sure it’s nothing. They’ll fix you up when we get to the hospital.”

 

Stu huffed and closed his eyes. He couldn’t help the dread forming in the back of his mind, but he could ignore it for now.

* * *

* * *

 

“Stuart Pot, you’re a good kid, so I won’t send you to prison. But, you put someone in a coma, so I’m forced to give you two hundred hours of community service and you must pay for the damages to the building. Some of the community service may be spent caring for Murdoc Niccals, if it so pleases you.”

 

The knocking of the gavel ended the sentencing period and Stuart let out a sigh. He’d have to dip into his savings to pay the fine, but he was still happy overall. He had been sure that it would be worse after seeing the guy he’d hit. Stu absently scratched at the bandages still covering his right eye as his lawyer escorted him out. His parents hadn’t said much when he’d called besides asking if he’d need a lawyer. Still, he’s glad that they asked. The courts probably wouldn’t have provided him with anyone good enough to keep him out of prison.

 

Stuart pulled out a pack of fags as soon as he was outside. He yelped when it was taken out of his hands. 

 

“Really, Stu? You just got out of court.”

 

The blue-haired man sighed, “‘Allo, Paula.”

 

The woman pulled a cigarette out for herself, “How’d it go?”

 

“Community service an’ a fine. Fink ‘m gonna take care of the bloke I hit for the first part.”

 

“Why would you do that? Didn’t his friends say he’s a sociopath?” Paula asked, holding the fag in front of her lips. Stuart shrugged and lit it for her, “It’s the least I can do.”

 

His girlfriend took a drag and exhaled, “It’s your choice. I wish you wouldn’t, though.”

 

Stuart gave her a curious look, “Why wouldn’t I? That ain’t very nice.”

 

“Oh, Stu,” Paula sighed. He gave her a grin and put an arm around her waist. 

 

“Love you, Paula.”

 

She kissed his cheek before leading him back to her car. He guessed it was their car now, since he didn’t have one anymore. Thinking made his head hurt, though, so he let the thought hang. 

* * *

* * *

 

 

The first time he brought him home was when Paula decided to go visit friends in France for a weekend. He kissed her goodbye, then went to go pick up Murdoc. Getting him inside was hell, but Stuart managed. He sat him down on the couch and gave him a smile. 

 

“”M gonna go put the kettle on. I’ll be right back,” he said happily as he went to the kitchen. When he came back, Murdoc was still lying on the couch. Stu chuckled and brushed his bangs off his forehead. 

 

“You mind if I turn on the telly?” Stu waited for an answer before realising what was happening, “Guess you won’t if you ain’t watchin’ it. Paula would, though. She’s my girlfriend. She didn’t want me to care for you, but she ain’t here this weekend, so I thought what she dun know won’t kill her.”

 

He grabbed the remote and turned it on, finding himself greeted by the theme song of a children’s show. 

 

“That’s right, last time we used it, Paula was babysittin’. ‘S not really my cuppa tea, but maybe you like it.”

 

He sat down, only to get back up again a moment later when he heard whistling, “Oh, that’s the kettle. I better go get it. Don’t go anywhere.”

 

Stuart snickered at his own joke as he went to go get his peppermint tea. He thought he heard Murdoc groan, but discarded it as his own imagination. On his way back, he grabbed one of Paula’s hair ties and pulled his bangs away from his face. Once he was back in his seat, he felt like Murdoc was staring at him. 

 

“I ain’t gay or anyfin, not that ‘eres anyfin wrong wif bein’ gay. I just ain’t. I jus like pullin’ m’hair back so I dun gotta blow it outta m’eyes all the time. I should really get it cut, but Paula likes it like this.”

 

He sipped his tea, staring mindlessly as the television. It was deathly quiet in the room. 

 

“I love ‘er, but Paula is a bit of a bitch sometimes. She treats me like ‘m stupid an’ goes on trips a lot. She told me that she ain’t cheatin’, but I dunno. Maybe ‘m jus bein’ jealous, like she says. Still, though, I wonder.”

 

Stuart pulled the patch Paula insisted he wear off his right eye and sighed, “That’s better. Y’know, ‘m really sorry for the accident. I wasn’t in my right mind when it happened. Ah promise to make it up to you when you wake up.”

 

Murdoc’s arm twitched. His caretaker finished his tea, continuing to chat with the comatose man on his couch. He eventually turned off the telly after his neighbor knocked on the wall. Stuart talked until he looked at the clock and found that it was almost midnight. 

 

“Fuckin’ hell, it’s late. I oughta put you in bed.”

 

He took Murdoc back to his room and laid him down on the bed, the other twitching as soon as he was tucked in. Stuart grabbed some jammies and left the room, closing the door gently behind him. He got ready for bed in the bathroom, examining his black eye in the mirror for the first time since the bandages came off. The doctor had called it an eight-ball fracture. He would be stuck with the one black eye for the rest of his life. Paula thought it was creepy, but Stuart thought it went well with his hair. He covered his good eye and smiled at the creepy guy staring back at him. 

 

“Like a hero in a zombie film,” he whispered to himself. Stuart finished his nightly routine and went to go make up the couch for himself.

 

* * *

* * *

 

Months went by. Paula started going out of town once or twice a month, so Stuart brought Murdoc home pretty often. On weekends when he wasn’t taking care of Murdoc, he was removing graffiti from buildings as part of his service. He took a picture of every piece they covered up so he could describe it to Murdoc later. The bloke may not like graffiti, but Stu thought it was awesome and wanted to share it with him. He had found that simply telling Murdoc about his day was a really good way to relieve stress, even if the other never said anything.

 

But, not everything was going well in his life. Fights with Paula were becoming more commonplace. He didn’t like that she went out of town so often and she suddenly started revealing things about him she didn’t like. Stuart could feel a new distance between them. It was agony for him. He distracted himself by throwing himself into his work. Suddenly, he was getting the top sales. His boss insisted that he wear a patch over his bad eye, though, as it freaked out a lot of younger customers. 

 

With all of this, it was no wonder that he felt a strain in his life. But, he still thought he had it good.

 

It all came crashing down when he came home from work to find Paula getting fucked on their couch by another man. 

 

“Wot the bloody ‘ell, Paula?” he asked loudly. The man stilled, but she didn’t stop rolling her hips as she answered Stuart, “I’m- ah- getting laid.”

 

The fully-clothed man stared at her, wanting to be mad, but unable to find it in him to be angry. Paula looked back at him. 

 

“Sorry, Stu. I wanted to break up with you earlier, but, you know…”

 

Stuart closed his eyes and sighed, “I understand. ‘S just… I was finkin of takin’ you home to meet me mum.”

 

The guy that Paula was still fucking cleared his throat. She looked at him, “Let’s break up later, Stu, alright? I’m kinda in the middle of something here.”

 

The other blushed and nodded, already walking backwards out of the apartment, “Sorry.”

 

He closed the door as quickly as possible, letting out a sigh. He decided to go to a movie, but found it impossible to concentrate as a headache began pounding against his skull right after it began. He hadn’t been allowed to have the pills he’d been reliant on since the accident, so he was forced to stick with extra-strength tylenol and a silent wish. Neither of them ever worked. Stuart was suddenly glad that he sat in the back of the dark theater when he started crying from a combination of the pain and the stress caused by walking in on his girlfriend fucking another man. He was extremely thankful when an elderly lady sitting nearby handed him some tissues. He even tracked her down after the move just to thank her. 

 

When he went back home, the other guy was long gone and Paula was sitting on the couch next to a packed suitcase. 

 

“Wotcha doin?”

 

“I was waiting for you. It’s been fun, but I don’t love you. You understand, right Stu-Pot?”

 

“Yeah, I get it. You said you might nevah love me when we started datin’. I was juss hopin’ I could change ya mind. A fool’s errand, I guess.”

 

“Can’t say I didn’t warn you.”

 

“So, where ya goin’?”

 

“I’m gonna stay with a friend from now on. She’s been looking for a flatmate for ages now. I’ve already got the rest of my stuff over at her place. I just don’t think it’s right for us to keep living together now that we ain’t dating. We can still be friends, though, if you like.”

 

“Oh, okay. It’s been fun, Paula Cracker.”

 

Stuart offered his hand to his now ex. She chuckled and shook it, “It sure has, Stuart Pot. See you around.”

 

Paula grabbed the handle of her suitcase and rolled it out of the living room, leaving the poor man to just watch. He stood there for a second before fetching his keyboard out of his room. He carefully sat down on the couch, beginning to play and already missing Paula’s guitar backing him up. The little tune reminded him of Murdoc, though. It was nice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this is gonna be a multi-chapter thing, but this is what I've got for now, so this is what's getting posted. If you don't get it, this is an AU where Murdoc was just casually browsing through a store and 2D, while he was high as fuck on pain medication, crashed into it with his car, putting the pistachio pal into a coma and giving himself his first eight-ball fracture. I don't really know where I'm going to take this, but it's a good idea for an AU, isn't it?  
> 


	2. The Spare Room

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With every choice we make, we either come closer to or go further from our destiny. In this chapter, one blue-haired man makes some decisions that may change his life forever and meets someone new.

He brought Murdoc home every weekend after she left him. Paula had left her bed and her wardrobe behind, so Stuart started putting his comatose friend in there at night. Murdoc might’ve been a little creepy, but he was great company overall. Because of all the weekends spent caring for Murdoc and the off days he spent doing other community service, he completed his sentence quickly. He still showed up at the hospital to visit Murdoc almost every weekend. The nurses always gave him big smiles or flirted with him when he came. 

 

It was about a month after he completed his sentence that the doctor walked in on one of his visits. 

 

“Mr. Pot, I presume?”

 

Stuart turned and nodded, “Yeah, dat’s me. Wos goin’ on?”

 

“You like to visit Mr. Niccals a lot, don’t you?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“Is it guilt or something? Most people only visit their loved ones here because of guilt.”

 

“Naw, I juss like talkin’ to him.”

 

“And it says here that you were a great caretaker, is that right?”

 

“Yup. Ah always returned ‘m wif ten fingahs, ten toes. Wos this all about, doc?”

 

“I’ll just cut to the chase. Mr. Niccals has no family that’s able or willing to care for him and he’s about to be moved. Do you want to take him in or not?”

 

“Oh, is dat it? I’ll take ‘im, no problem.”

 

“Are you sure? Based on information from his last flatmate, and I quote, he’s a right arsehole.”

 

“I’ll be fine. Where do I sign?”

 

The doctor led Stuart to his office. About an hour later, he was wheeling Murdoc out of the hospital, smiling at the receptionist that had always flirted with him on his way out. He refrained from talking until they reached his apartment. But, as soon as the door was closed, he was sighing, “Aw, Muds, wot ‘ave I signed m’self up for?”

 

The other did nothing but twitch. Stuart chuckled and took Murdoc to his new room. He started thinking about all the things his comatose friend would need. He put Murdoc on the bed and left the room again to start writing things down in a notebook. 

_ Clothes, nappies, someone to watch him during the day _

 

Stuart thought about the last thing on his list for a second before crossing it out. He’d probably be able to take Murdoc to work since his boss was such a nice fellow, but the other things would have to be gathered right away. He didn’t want to leave Murdoc, but they’d just gotten back. After a few minutes of thought, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialed a number.    
  


“ _ Please tell me you’re not drunk and missing me, _ ” Paula said upon picking up. 

 

“Nice to ‘ear from ya, too. ‘M takin’ care of Murdoc now an’ I need some stuff, but I dun wanna leave m’flat. Couldya help me out ‘ere, Paula?”

 

“ _ I thought you finished your community service _ .”

 

“Ah did, but he don’t got no family or anyfin an’ the doctor told me they was gonna move ‘im away, so ah said I’d take ‘im.”

 

“ _ Why the bloody hell did you do something like that _ ?”

 

“‘Cause ‘s the right thing ta do. Please, Paula?”

 

He heard his ex sigh and grinned. 

 

“Fanks. I’ll make up up to ya, ah swear!”

 

“ _ I’ll believe that when you call me from a plastic island. _ ”

 

Stuart laughed and hung up. A little over a half hour later, Paula brought him the requested items. 

 

“God, that eye is fucking freaky, Stu. You really should just keep it covered up.”

 

“Ah fink ‘s neat.”

 

The woman rolled her eyes and set the grocery bags down. She chatted for a little while before she had to leave. Stuart waved her out, shutting the door as politely as he could behind her. After all, who knew whether she’d want to be friends or not? He figured if she still wanted to be around him, he would take the chance to have her friendship.

* * *

* * *

 

 

He settled into his new routine rather quickly. Every day, he got up and ate breakfast before going to check on Murdoc. The man was always laying just the way Stuart had left him the night before, so his caretaker went to go get ready for the day. He returned to the room once more to put Murdoc in his wheelchair. Then, they walked to Uncle Norm's Organ Emporium together. Stuart left his ward in the backroom as he opened up shop. He would do his work as normal, occasionally slipping into the backroom to check on Murdoc. After work, they’d go back home and Stuart would talk to Murdoc until he was tired. Sometimes, Paula would come over to drag the more lively of the two out for the night. Murdoc would be left in the care of a neighbor until Stu came back, usually around 2 or 3 in the morning and always at least a little drunk. 

 

This continued until Stuart’s manager pulled him aside and told him he couldn’t bring Murdoc to work anymore. 

 

“Why? He ain’t botherin’ nobody.”

 

“He’s not bothering the customers, but Miss Beth and Mister Spencer are complaining. Miss Beth says it feels like he’s staring at her every time she takes a break and I have to agree. He’s creepy as all hell, Mister Pot.”

 

“I ain’t gonna stop bringin’ ‘im, sir. He ain’t got no one else to take care of ‘im.”

 

“It’s either you or him.”

 

Stuart nodded and took off his name tag, “Fanks for the job.”

 

His ex-manager stared at him as he got Murdoc and left for the final time.

 

* * *

* * *

 

 

Stuart almost regretted his choice when he realised he only had enough money in his savings to keep himself and Murdoc taken care of for a month. He began job searching immediately, going to as many interviews as he could. Eventually, he landed one for a place called Big Rick Black's Record Shack. He put on his interview clothes, dropped Murdoc off at Paula’s, and took the tube there. His interviewer was an American man with white eyes and a rough demeanor. Stuart felt slightly scared, but he attributed it to the pills he’d taken that morning and answered every question as honestly as he could. 

 

“Why do you want this job?”

 

“Well, y’see, ‘m takin’ care of his guy named Murdoc righ’ now an’ I juss lost m’job. I can’ afford to take care of both of us for much longer, so ‘m hopin’ you can help me out ‘ere.”

 

The interviewer gave him a look, “That’s a noble thing you’re doing, Mr. Pot.”

 

“Call me Stuart.”

 

The interviewer smiled and stood up. The string bean across from him followed his example, suddenly getting a bad feeling about the interview. He shook the American’s offered hand and gave him the kindest smile he could muster. 

 

“We’re done here, Stuart. I’m gonna have to run it by the boss, but, just between you and me, I’d say you’ve got the job if you a good worker.”

 

“Oh, yessir!! Ah can work juss as hard as anyone. Fank you, sir!”

 

“None of that sir business. It’s Russel.”

 

“‘S a pleasure to meetcha, Russel.”

 

Russel smiled again and let go of the skinny man’s hand, “Same. I’ll see you soon, Stuart.”

  
The Brit nodded and gathered his things. He left Big Rick Black's Record Shack with a huge smile on his face and a new spring in his step. He and Murdoc would be perfectly fine if everything went the way Russel had said it would. He felt a change in the wind, almost as if something important had just happened. Stuart couldn’t wait to tell Murdoc about it. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, I've updated this one really quickly. I just have a lot of ideas for this fic!! On Russel's appearance, I would love to hear your opinions on his appearance. I'm not sure whether he should become a regular character the way Paula is or not. Also, yes, she will continue to be prominent in this fic. To be totally honest, I'm really intrigued by her character and the fact that all we know about her for certain is the fact that she dated 2D and cheated on him with Murdoc. That's not to say she's not a bitch, but I do believe that 2D would have continued to be friends with her in the canon universe had she cheated on him with someone who wasn't in the band. It's just my personal opinion.  
> 


	3. The Record Store

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Those who were previously thought to have infinite patience will eventually get tired of waiting. What happens when Stuart is one of those people?

Stu got a call from Russel the very next day, telling him he’d gotten the job and he started the following Monday. That was on a Friday, so all he had to do was survive the weekend and he’d be set. Thankfully, he didn’t have any uniform to buy. It was just put on clothes he was comfortable in and go to work. That would definitely cut down on his laundry. He even decided to take Murdoc to a park after he got the call as something special. 

 

Stuart hadn’t realised it was already autumn, but the piles of leaves and lack of children confirmed this for him. He stopped at a bench after walking for a while to figure it out. It was late September- or maybe early October, he didn’t know for certain- and the accident had happened in late March. So, Murdoc had been in a coma for around seven months now, if Stuart had all of his math right. He looked over at his comatose friend. 

 

“Ah ‘ope you’re ‘avin’ a good rest, Murdoc. If it ain’t too much trouble, wouldja mind wakin’ up sometime soon? It’d be nice to ‘ave you talk back.”

 

He got nothing but silence in return. Stuart sighed and ran a hand through his hair. Taking care of Murdoc was the right thing to do, but he wasn’t certain if it was worth it. If it weren’t for Paula dragging him out at least once every two weeks, he’d probably have gone mad by now. He’d bitten off more than he could chew. All of his old chums except Paula have stopped calling and texting him. Barely anyone would come around the flat anymore, saying Murdoc always creeped them out. He’d only gotten laid once in the past two months. But, he couldn’t just abandon Murdoc. 

 

“‘Ow ‘bout ah make you a deal? If you wake up by the one year mark, I’ll do whatevah you want, long as you dun ask for sex or anyfin like that. But, if you don’t, I’ll take you back to the hospital and tell ‘em I juss can’ take care o’ you. ‘Ow ‘bout dat?”

 

Stuart sighed and put his head in his hands at the lack of response.

 

“Ah muss be goin’ mad, makin’ deals wif someone who’s in a coma.”

 

He peeked at Murdoc, only to find the man’s long tongue had fallen out of his mouth. Stuart sighed and pulled a handkerchief he’d taken to carrying around simply for putting the tongue back in its place. He wondered aloud how the other got stuck with such a thing and imagined that the other chuckled and launched into some extravagant story about how he ended up with a tongue all the ladies loved. Or all the fellas- Stuart still wasn’t sure which way Murdoc swung. He took a good look at the other’s face. 

 

“Ah guess you’re pretty enough. If ah’d met chu in a bar, ah’d probably ‘ave gotten drunk wif you. Dunno if you’d like someone like me, though. I’ll ‘ave to ask you what you think when you wake up.”

 

Stuart sighed and tucked the handkerchief away, “If you wake up, ah guess.”

 

Murdoc’s entire face twitched, momentarily looking like he was pissed about something. Stuart chuckled and patted his head. 

 

“Okay, when you wake up. Sorry, Muds.”

 

The comatose man twitched again before going totally still.

* * *

* * *

 

 

Stuart spent his final day before the work week getting high as all shit. Thankfully, he was able to shake off the high before he had to get himself and Murdoc ready for work on Monday. They arrived fifteen minutes before opening and met Russel at the door. He looked over the comatose man before saying anything.

 

“So, this is the guy that made you get this job, huh?”

 

“Yup! This here is Murdoc Niccals. He’s been out for ‘bout seven months now.”

 

“That’s nothing. I was in a coma for four years when I was younger.”

 

“Really? Wot ‘appened, if you dun mind me askin’?”

 

Russel frowned, “There was a demon. It possessed me and made me beat the shit out of a friend. I had to be put in a medically-induced coma to stop getting into fights. It took my ‘rents four years to find an exorcist who could get rid of it.”

 

Stuart could feel his eyebrows go up, “Wow, ‘at sounds pretty bad. Ah guess you dun really like bein’ possessed anymore.”

 

The American grinned and turned to walk into the store, “Actually, I’m being possessed right now.”

 

The poor Brit sputtered and followed after him, “Wot?”

 

“My boyfriend Del and I were hanging out with some of our friends a few years ago. Then, some fuckass racists decided to start shootin’ at us. I got down, but Del and my friends weren’t so lucky. I got sent to my uncle here in London after that and I’ve been here ever since. I found out that Del was possessing me a few months after coming here. It was kinda weird at first, but we’ve made it work.”

 

“‘Ow does it work?”

 

Russel shook his head, “We gotta open up. I’ll tell you some other time. You can put Murdoc in the back and start sweepin’.”

 

Stuart nodded and took Murdoc to the back room, instantly regretting it when he saw the goat-pig-monkey abomination. Later, he’d say his high-pitched scream is what almost woke Murdoc up. For right now, he’d swear it was Russel’s deep, booming laughter once he found out what was going on. 

 

At the end of the day, Stuart looked up from his reshelving to see his ex-girlfriend walking into the shop.

 

“‘Allo, Paula. ‘Ow was work?”

 

“It was okay. How about you? How’s this place treating you?”

 

She looked around the cramped shop, looking a little unsure. Stuart smiled and placed a record in a bin, “‘S nice. Ah like it much bettah than Uncle Norm’s.”

 

“Why? Uncle Norm’s wasn’t so cluttered.”

 

“Ah like the clutter. ‘S nice. Besides, ah get to wear what ah wan’ as long as ah wear this name tag durin’ working hours.”

 

“That’s nice, I suppose. I brought you some of those biscuits you like, by the way,” she said with a shrug, handing him a box. He opened it as soon as it was in his hands and grinned at the sweets. 

 

“Fanks, Paula. You’re th’ best.”

 

“Just gotta make sure you don’t forget it, Stu-Pot.”

 

He laughed and handed them back to her, “Can you tell Russel to put these in th’ back for me? He’s the fella at the desk. Tell ‘im I’ll owe ‘im.”

 

Paula looked up at the American, narrowing her eyes at him, “He’s a little scary, don’t you think? He looks like one of those guys that cuts up dead animals and sews them together.”

 

“Acutally, ‘at’s exactly what he does. Ah ran into one of his creations this mornin’. Scared the livin’ daylights outta me.”

 

“Really? That’s fucked up.”

 

“Paula, be nice. He ain’t been no’fin but kind to me since ah met ‘im,” Stuart scolded. She rolled her eyes and walked over. Her ex went back to his job, feeling a headache starting. He tried to remember if he’d grabbed any meds before leaving that morning before Paula came back. 

 

“I’m gonna go. I’ve still got things to do. Do you want to get together the Friday for a jam session? None of my other friends are as good as you are at keyboard and I’ve been missing that pretty voice of yours.”

 

Stuart laughed, “Alright. Mine or yours?”

 

“Yours. We both know where it is.”

 

“‘Alrighty, I’ll see you then,” Stuart looked over at Russel, who was motioning for him to come over, “Looks like ah’ve gotta go. I’ll see you later, Paula.”

 

She nodded and walked out. Stuart immediately went to the counter, ignoring the new headache.

 

“Wos goin’ on?”

 

“Who was that, Stu? Your girlfriend or something?”

 

“Oh, that was Paula. She’s my ex, but we’re still friendly.”

 

“She seemed kinda bitchy.”

 

Stuart shrugged, “‘At’s juss the way she is.”

 

Russel shook his head, “You’re too nice for your own good, man. Why’d she come by, anyway?”

 

“She brought me biscuits and asked if we could jam on Friday.”

 

“Oh, you play?”

 

“Yeah, ah do keyboard and sing. Paula says I got a good voice. Wot ‘bout you?”

 

“I’m pretty good on drums. Del’s a really good rapper. He writes lyrics and shit for me when I’m asleep. I think it’s really sweet.”

 

“That’s awesome. Hey, d’you wanna come to our jam session? ‘M sure Paula would love to ‘ave you there.”

 

“Sure. I don’t think I have any plans for Friday anyway.” Russel looked up as the bell above the door rang, signaling the arrival of some customers. 

 

“Why don’t you see if you can take care of these guy, Stu? I’ll be here if you need me.”

 

Stuart nodded and put on his best “may-I-be-of-assistance” smile before turning around to greet the customers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE INSTANT I START A POSTING SCHEDULE, I ALMOST FORGET TO FOLLOW IT. I AM A MESS.  
> Anyways, this chapter holds a special place in my heart bc it's kind of a rant. Recently, I've been really patient while dealing with some bullshit in my life and what better place to rant about it than in my shitty AU? Fuck, I'm tired.  
> 


	4. The Drum Machine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When new friends meet old ones, one of two outcomes occur if the new friends are true. In this chapter, both of those are displayed unknowingly by an unlikely group.

The week flew by as Stuart’s excitement for Friday grew. His biggest job at Big Rick’s was reshelving and sweeping. Otherwise, he spent his time talking to Russel about everything and anything. As it turned out, this rough-and-tumble guy was the biggest sweetheart Stu had ever met. He brought baked goods on Thursday and always kept an extra umbrella in case of rainy days. Russel yawned a lot, but he always made sure to pay attention to their conversations. Stu quickly decided he wanted to be this guy's friend, so he started thinking of nice things he could do.

 

On Friday, Stuart decided to get both of them food for lunch. He snuck out on his break and returned about ten minutes later with a bag of fast food. When he walked in, Russel was snoring at the front desk. A man who practically glowed stood behind him. Stu’s eyes widened, but he refrained from making noise. The man looked up and pressed a finger against his mouth. 

 

Stu nodded, going to the back to eat his lunch. He finished as quickly as possible and wrote Russel’s name on a sticky note. After it was pressed firmly against the bag, he walked back out to sit down next to his sleeping friend and the odd man. 

 

“Hey, you’re Stuart, aren’t you?”

 

“Yeah. ‘M guessin’ you’re Del?”

 

“That’d be right. Russ told me about you. You’re doing a really decent thing there, Stu.”

 

“Fanks. ‘S the least ah can do for ‘im.”

 

Del nodded and looked around, “Man, it’s been awhile since I’ve been out during the day. It’s almost November now, ain’t it?”

 

“Ah fink so. ‘S weird how fast time passes, don’chu fink?”

 

The spirit nodded, “Yeah. You don’t realise how fast it goes until it’s all gone.”

 

Stu frowned at Del’s sad tone. He decided that it would never do. 

 

“Russ said you’re a pretty good rapper.”

 

“Did he? He’s being generous, man. I ain’t shit.”

 

“Ah’d still like to ‘ear it.”

 

“Maybe some other time. He’s about to wake up.”

 

Stuart hadn’t noticed the lack of snores from his friend until now. Del kissed Russel’s head before disappearing. The American picked his head up, looked around, and yawned. 

 

"Where'd you go, Stu?"

 

"Ah got you some food. 'S in th' back."

 

Russel grinned, "Thanks, man. That's really nice. You okay with watchin' the store while I go eat."

 

"Go ahead. Ah ain' goin' no where."

 

The American nodded and stood up. He stretched for a minute before going to get his food.

 

* * *

* * *

 

 

That afternoon, Russel and Stuart closed up together before heading to the Brit’s apartment. Paula was waiting at the door with her guitar and a fresh pizza. As soon as they got inside, Stu left his two friends in the living room so he could go put Murdoc up. He paused in the hallway, far enough away that no one would notice him, but close enough that he could hear every word they said. 

 

“Listen, I just think he’s a nice guy and you shouldn’t be so bitchy to him.”

 

“Which one of us dated him again? I know him far better than you do, Russel, if that’s even your real name.”

 

“That’s the name my mama gave me and I’ll go by it until the day I die. What about you, Paula Cracker?”

 

“And what’s that supposed to mean?”

 

“I’m just saying, at least your name fits. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a joint in Stuart Pot’s hand.”

 

Paula laughed, “Did he never tell you that he put Murdoc in a coma because he was high as a kite on pain meds? That man is a stoner through and through. We spent the first few months of our relationship doing nothing but getting high and having sex. God, those were three glorious months. It’s too bad they stopped as soon as he had the accident.”

 

“Is that why you broke up with him?”

 

“No, I broke up with him because he never had any interest in me after the accident. He was always either working or taking care of Murdoc. I cheated on him for five months before he figured it out. He probably wouldn’t have figured it out if he hadn’t walked in on me having sex with another man on the couch.”

 

“On this couch?”

 

“No, that one over there.”

 

“I’m pretty sure that qualifies as a love seat.”

 

“Then I’m pretty sure I used it for its intended purpose.”

 

“Goddamn, that’s disgusting, girl. I can’t believe he kept it.”

 

“Me neither. I almost had a heart attack the first time I came over and saw that damn thing.”

 

“Man, Stu-Pot is weird as hell.”

 

“That’s just how he is. Honestly, his oddness is what attracted me to him in the first place. Did you know that his hair isn’t dyed? He fell out of a tree when he was ten and all his hair fell out. When it grew back, it was that exact shade of blue. No doctor he’s ever had has been able to explain why.”

 

“I’d be weirded out if stranger shit hadn’t happened to me. I got possessed by a demon when I was a kid and had to go in a coma for four years so I wouldn’t beat the shit out of everyone I knew. Right now, my rapping boyfriend and a couple of my old friend are possessing me because they were hit in a drive-by.”

 

“That’s fucked up. I wonder what’s next. A cyborg version of a little girl kicking Stu’s arse every time he tries saying something sassy?”

 

Russel made an unhappy noise, “What kinda fucked up shit is that?”

 

“I dunno, I just thought it was funny.”

 

“Man, what the hell are you on? Why did Stu deal with your cracker ass for so long?”

 

“Who fucking knows? Let’s just agree to disagree for his sake.”

 

“As long as you stay in your lane and don’t say fucked up shit like that.”

 

“Alright, then we’ve got ourselves a deal.”

 

Stu peeked around the corner to see them shaking hands. He decided it was a good time to come back into the room. 

 

“Sorry ah took so long. Muds wouldn’ work wif me.”

 

“That’s alright, Stu,” the man’s ex said. He gave her a smile before pulling his keyboard out of the nook between his chair and the end table. 

 

“We oughta get workin’. Russ, ah dun ‘ave any drums, but ‘ere’s a drum machine righ’ next t’ya.”

 

The American picked it up and fiddled with it for a few seconds before shrugging. 

 

“Ain’t nothing like mine, but it’ll work.”

 

“Wos yours like?”

 

“It’s got all the beats in the world and some of the most famous drummers in the world are haunting it, so I’d say it’s pretty good. Paula, you ready?”

  
She plugged her guitar into Stu’s amp before nodding. With her confirmation, Stuart started playing the first melody he thought of. Thankfully, it seemed that the others picked up on it quickly. He felt the music surround his soul as he began to sing under his breath, “It’s the music that we choose.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just kind of a filler chapter, but I had a lot of struggles with it. I was editing it up until five minutes before I posted it. The next chapter will be just kinda glancing over the holidays, but some of the more prominent ones, such as Christmas and New Years, will be mentioned.


	5. The Holidays

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The longest year of his life has drawn to a close. Now, the one that shall determine his future is ready. If only he could remember...

More months flew by. Winter came in a haze of whiteness and cold nights. Stuart barely remembered the time spent with either of his friends. All he knew was as he grew closer to Russel, Paula grew further away. Gradually, he stopped talking to Murdoc as much as he had in the past. The man was twitching and making faces more often nowadays, but Stu figured he was just getting close to waking up. He barely paid any attention to the Christmas trees in store windows as December passed. He just smiled and didn’t come in on Christmas Day. The Buddhist was much happier the day before New Years Eve, when Russel asked if he was doing anything for the New Year. 

 

“Paula an’ I usually go out togevah, but she’s got plans. Ah wos finkin’ of stayin’ in an’ getting drunk by myself. Wot about you?”

 

“I’m gonna get some sleep. I’ve never liked doing something big for the new year. It’s just another year. What’s so special about it?”

 

“Ah guess ah see where you’re comin’ from. Wot d’ya fink ‘98’s gonna be like?”

 

“I don’t know. We’ll find out tomorrow.”

 

Stuart wanted to say more, but a group of teenagers came in talking about some blurry band. He attended to them, going back to Russel after they left. 

 

“Wot if tomorrow comes today?”

 

“Man, what are you smokin’?”

 

“Nofin. Ah actually use edibles a lot. Keeps th’ neighbors from asking questions.”

 

Russel laughed, shaking his head. Stu didn’t know what was funny, but he laughed with him. He heard a crash in the back and jumped. 

 

“Wot was dat?”

 

“I don’t know,” Russel said, grabbing a broom, “You stay here. I’m gonna go check it out.”

 

Stu nodded quickly. His coworker went back there with careful steps. The Brit only had to wait two minutes before his name was called. He went slowly. Murdoc still in his chair, tongue sticking out. Russel closed the door to the outside, which was only a few feet away. 

 

“Wot ‘appened?”

 

“Someone tried to rob the back room. I think they knocked something over when they saw Murdoc. Man, it’s a damn good thing that he was here. They might’ve gotten off with something valuable otherwise.”

 

Stu nodded, pulling out his handkerchief to put the tongue back in its place. Russel flipped the lock on the door and sighed, “I hope nothing big broke. Johnny’ll kill me if something valuable broke on my watch.”

 

“Ah thought Big Rick owned th’ place.”

 

“Rick died a few years ago. He left the place to his brother, Johnny. He’s kind of a jackass, but I respect him.”

 

Stuart hummed and finished his job. Murdoc groaned loudly. 

 

“Hey, didja hear dat?”

 

“Yeah. That’s a good sign.”

 

“Ah hope he wakes up soon. ‘M gettin’ a littl’ sick of dis.”

 

“I thought you were happy to do it.”

 

“Dat wos a few months ago. Really, ah’d like it more if I could learn somefin’ ‘bout him for once.”

 

“You’ve just gotta be patient, man. He’ll wake up in his own time. He probably won’t take much longer anyway. Just wait a little bit longer, okay Stu?”

 

The Brit put his handkerchief away with a sigh, “You’re probably righ’. Fanks, Russ.”

 

“Anything for a friend.”

 

* * *

* * *

 

 

After the new year, the store got incredibly busy for some reason. Stuart didn’t talk to Russel as often and Paula didn’t talk to him much anymore at all. Everytime he thought to ask why, he forgot by the next time he heard from her. Time passed by and Stuart and Russel finally got back to the point where they could take their lunch breaks together. On the first day of this being possible, the taller of the two looked at the calendar they kept in the back and paused. 

 

“Is it really February now?”

 

Russel looked at the item without moving away from his food, “I guess so. Time sure does fly.”

 

Murdoc grunted from his place in the corner of the room. Stuart looked at him, a new sadness blossoming in his chest. 

 

“It’ll be a year in March. Ah juss didn’ realise it was so close.”

 

Russel hummed and started eating, so Stuart didn’t give any more of his thoughts a voice. He thought about the one glance he’d gotten of Murdoc’s waking face before hitting him and crashing into a wall. His bad eye ached at the memory. Stu got a bottle of pills out of his bag and took two with a sip of his drink. He felt his coworker look at him as he downed them. 

 

“Me eye.”

 

“What’s wrong with it, anyway? I’ve never seen you without that patch.”

 

“‘S an eight-ball fracture. Ah got it in th’ accident. Ah fink th’ doctor said me eye was pushed back in th’ socket or sumfin’ like that an’ it filled up wif blood, so ‘s harder to see out of it. It’s totally black. Ah finik ‘s neat, but everyone else said it wos freaky, so ah cover it up. ‘S juss easier.”

 

“Now I gotta see this. C’mon, Stu, please?”

 

The Brit quickly peeled off the patch, blinking twice before looking at Russel. He grinned at his friend.

 

“I think it’s pretty cool. We’re like two peas in a pod,” he said, pointing at his own blank eyes. Stuart couldn’t help the joyful smile that lit up his face.

 

“Fanks, mate.”

 

“You should leave it off for the rest of the day. It’d look awesome.”

 

“Bu wot about th’ customers? Wot if ah scare ‘em?”

 

“Man, the guys that come in this shop ain’t pussies. They look at my eyes and they ain’t scared. It’ll be fine, I promise.”

 

Stuart gave the patch in his hand one last look before crumbling it up and throwing it into the trash can. Russel patted his shoulder and went back to eating his lunch. The Brit picked up his own sandwich, but another grunt from Murdoc made him give the comatose man another look. 

 

“Do y’fink Murdoc would like it?”

 

“If he ain’t an asshole, he will. Eat ya lunch, man.”

 

Finally, he gave up the conversation and dug in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp, I have officially missed an upload date. Ah well, on with some of the exposition. This chapter wasn't so much a bitch as the last one, but, of course, you can find out just how by reading this shameless self plug an going to my Tumblr (@geeky-pan).


	6. The Keyboard

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some days are so quiet, you'll do anything to fill the blank space.

He’d never been one to celebrate Valentine’s Day, but when he learned that he had the day off, Stu wasn’t complaining. Last year, he’d spent the whole day with Paula. Now, he set Murdoc up on the couch and got drunk on cheap beer. Eventually, he started talking about everything and anything he could think of. His comatose friend laid there, never moving at all as Stu told him all about whatever he could think of. 

 

“And then, th’ mouse jumped in m’ ‘and! Me mum wos so scared,” he laughed at his own story. Murdoc didn’t make a single noise. Stu looked at his ward’s face, the smile slowly disappearing from his own.

 

“‘M doin’ it again, ain’t I? God, I wish you were awake.”

 

He downed the rest of his bottle and set it aside, “Ah wondah wot would make you wake up. Maybe a jolt or sumfin’? Maybe this is like one o’ those princess stories an’ ah gotta kiss ya.”

 

Stuart chuckled, “No, ‘at’s ridiculous. I’m one dumb motherfukah, aren’t I? Maybe ‘at’s why Paula left me.”

 

He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. The Brit looked around the floor for something to do to take his mind off the loneliness. His keyboard sat on the other side of the room, a bass guitar he’d forgotten he had leaned up next to it. The sight made him feel odd. Stu got up and grabbed his keyboard. He gave the bass a long look before going back to his seat. 

 

“Ah dunno why ah ‘ave it. Paula took everythin’ she owned wif ‘er an’ ah dunno how to play. Ah wondah if you do, Muds.”

 

The comatose man continued to silently sleeping. His caretaker sat down next to him and stared at his keyboard.His eyes glazed over as he started pressing keys. A melody that felt too familiar,  yet brand new filled the room. Stu started humming the notes in the air, just imagining a bass playing along. An unexpected smile broke out on his face. Something like a memory was buzzing around in his head, but he couldn’t quite recall it. In his mind’s eye, he saw an all-too familiar tree sitting in front of his childhood home. 

 

Before he could think about the memory any further, he hit a sour note. The tree and his former home faded into the background again as he looked down at his hands. They had stopped in midair, hovering above the keys he’d played a thousand times. Stu pulled them away slowly with wide eyes. 

 

“Holy fuck,” he whispered to himself as he picked up his beloved instrument and set it aside. Everything was silent except for his steady breathing. Somewhere else in the building, someone was shouting, but in Stu’s flat, all was still. He picked up the bottle he’d drained earlier and stared at the label. 

 

“Dat’s th’ last time ah trust this brand,” He said to no one, setting the bottle aside again. Stu took Murdoc to his room, then put on the radio. He had a feeling it was going to be a long night. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter is a day late, I know, but I don't want Murdoc to wake up yet and I needed something to fill the space. I promise, he'll wake up very soon, just be patient with me.


	7. The Other Apartmet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some people crave attention at all times. On occasion, that can be a bad thing.
> 
> Heads up for some minor sexual assault in this chapter

“Look, I’m just saying they’re kinda overrated. I mean, why does anyone wanna listen to someone sing about a yellow submarine?”

 

“‘Cause issa classic, ‘at’s why! An’ they don’ only sing about th’ yellow submarine.”

 

“Name one song they sing that’s not about yellow submarines or holdin’ hands.”

 

“‘Ere’s th’ one about th’ sun comin’ an’ th’ one about sayin’ hello an’ th’ one about blackbirds an’-”

 

“Okay, I get it, the bug guys did a lot of songs, but I still don’t like them.”

 

“Really? Ah thought you liked the blackbird one.”

 

“No, I like the one that goes blackbird singing in the dead of night.”

 

“‘At’s th’ blackbird one!”

 

“Ain’t no way those guys wrote the blackbird song.”

 

“Russ, ‘m tellin’ you, they did.”

 

The American shook his head, “Whatever, just ‘cause they made one decent song doesn’t mean they’re good.”

 

“Ah nevah said dat. Ah juss said they sometimes make good songs.”

 

“Now I know you’re fucking with me.”

 

Stuart laughed, dropping the record he was trying to put on the shelf. He turned to Russel, “Now look at wot chu made me do.”

 

“I nevah made ya do that, Stu,” said Russ as he waved at some regulars who came in. They waved back and went to the Brit. 

 

“Hey, Stu, how ya doin’ man?” the one whose name the blue-haired man just couldn’t remember said. He turned and smiled anyways, “‘M doin’ juss fine, fank you. Wot about you?”

 

Someone Stu had never seen before gasped, “Oh man, your eye.”

 

The Brit chuckled, going back to his work, “‘S an eight-ball fracture. Me eye’s stuck like that for now.”

 

“That’s awesome, actually. Hey, Derek said you guys always have Blur. Do you know where it is?”

 

“Hm? Oh, they should be over there, but ah dunno. You’ll 'ave t'ask Russ.”

 

“Man, you’re the one doin’ the reshelvin’!” The American called from his post. Stuart couldn’t help but laugh. The customers went in the direction that he’d pointed just as Stu’s phone started buzzing in his pocket. He pulled it out and looked at Russ. 

 

“Just go take it. I got them.”

 

Stuart nodded and went to the back room. He leaned against the wall next to Murdoc, flipping open his phone and pressing it to his cheek. 

 

“‘Ello?”

 

“Hey, Stu. Could you come over later today?”

 

He blinked twice, “Paula? Is ‘at chu?”

 

“Who else would it be, love? C’mon, come over. You can even bring Murdoc if you can’t find anyone to watch him.”

 

“O’course I’ll come, but why d’ya want me t’ come ovah? Jussa few weeks ago you woz sayin’ ah couldn’ because your new boyfrien’ wos practically livin’ wif chu.”

 

“I dumped that loser last week. He didn’t even get me anything for our six-month anniversary!”

 

“Oh, okay. ‘M gettin’ off at four, so ‘ows about ah come around at five?”

 

Paula laughed, “Of course, love, just get here by six, okay?”

 

“Yessum. I’ll see you then.”

 

“See you later, darling,” she hung up, leaving Stuart confused. It wasn’t that he didn’t understand her tone, but he didn’t understand why she seemed almost flirtatious. The more he thought about it, the more confused he got. Eventually, Stu shrugged with a sigh and went back to work. He’d deal with that headache later.

 

* * *

* * *

 

 

At exactly five forty-three, he was in front of her flat, Murdoc by his side. She opened the door quickly, throwing her arms around his neck the instant she saw him, “Stuart! It’s so good to see you, love.”

 

He hugged back, the familiar confusion coming back, “Hey, Paula. ‘S good t’ see you too. Sorry ‘m a little late.”

 

His ex pulled back to smile at him and noticed the bouquet in his left hand, “Oh, you sweetheart! You remembered my favorite flowers.”

 

“‘S kinda ‘ard t’ forget buttercups. You always liked ‘em after a bad day. Anyways, why’d ya ask me ‘ere?”

 

Paula laughed, grabbing the flowers, “Just come in. I’ll tell you after I get these in some water. Sit down anywhere you like.”

 

Stu watched his ex go back inside. The curiosity he’d felt before was increased tenfold, but he decided to trust her. Maybe she was just being nice and he was too messed up in the head to realise it. The man shook his head to clear away the thoughts as he grabbed Murdoc and went inside.

 

He quickly decided this wasn’t a place he’d want to live in. It was too bright and far too organised. A few posters of faraway places hung on the walls, none of which looked like the type of thing Paula would like. He sat down on a leather couch, placing Murdoc right beside him. His ex came back into the room with a smile on her face. It immediately disappeared when she saw Murdoc.

 

“I thought you were gonna find someone to watch him while we talked.”

 

“Ah thought you said ‘e’s welcome ‘ere.”

 

Paula sighed and sat down right next to Stu, “Of course he is, love. Whatever, now, about why I called you here…”

 

He nearly jumped out of his skin when she put her feet up and started leaning against his arm. Stu looked down at her with wide eyes. She smiled in a manner he used to love, “I miss you, Stu-Pot. ‘M sorry I broke up with you. Can you ever forgive me?”

 

He scooted a bit further down, anxiety crawling up his neck, “Wot? Ah thought I wos th’ one who broke up wif you.”

 

She laughed that same old shrieking laugh he’d loved way back when. Suddenly, Stu didn’t understand why he’d ever gone out with her in the first place. Paula scooted closer, both hands on his arm now, “Darling,  _ I _ was the one who told  _ you _ that it needed to happen. Don’t you remember?”

 

He tried scooting further away, but he was backed up against the arm of the couch now. Paula came closer, basically sitting in his lap. He gripped the edge of the seat as she put her arms around his neck. 

 

“C’mon, Stu, let’s go back to how we used to be. I’ve missed a lot about you, but most of all, I’ve missed that cock.” She punctuated her sentence by grinding down on him. He gasped, feeling his dick starting to come to life. Stu silently cursed himself as Paula hummed. 

 

“There it is. You know, I was thinkin’ about how we got started the other day and I realised, I miss all of that. Havin’ you around all the time and being in love. It was so nice, darling. I just don’t understand why that all ended.”

 

“You cheated on me.”

 

She shrugged, bringing one of her hands up to cup his cheek, “I was lonely. You paid more attention to Murdoc than you did me around that time. I know what I did was shitty, but it was really your fault for not caring about me at all.”

 

He groaned as she ground down again with a giggle, “You weren’t paying attention to me or our little friend. Have you even touched yourself since we broke up?”

 

Stuart shooked his head, pushing her away, “It doesn’ matter. Get off, Paula. Ah dun wanna be wif chu like that anymore.”

 

“Oh, come on, Stu. It’s bad enough you’re denying me this, but denying yourself? ‘M offering you anything you want here.”

 

“I want you to get off.”

 

“That’s not what your little friend here is saying.” Her other hand came up to cup his face as she brought her mouth closer to his. He pushed harder, brows furrowing. 

 

“C’mon Paula, leave me alone.”

 

She laughed softly, “You know you want this.”

 

Then, she kissed him. It felt wrong to him, like something that was never meant to happen. Before, their kisses had always been sweet, whether they were long or short. Stu had once compared kissing her to tasting honey when he was too high. Now, it was just bitter. He used all his strength to push her off and stand up. Paula hit the ground with a soft grunt, immediately giving Stu a sour look.

 

“What the hell? I thought you wanted that.”

 

He adjusted his trousers, “No, you wanted that. We aren’ togeva anymore, Paula. Y’ need t’ accept that if we’re goin’ t’ be friends. Ah dun even know if ah  _ wanna _ be friends wif chu anymore. Ah do like you an’ ah fink you’re a good person, Paula, bu’ ah can’ be around you if you wanna be togeva again.”

 

She pulled herself in fetal position, looking down, “‘M sorry, Stu. I thought you still wanted to be with me.”

 

“Ah did, bu’ that wos a long time ago. ‘M not th’ ‘same person anymore an’ you ain’ either.”

 

“What do you mean?” she asked with a glance upwards. Stu knelt down and cupped her cheek.

 

“The Paula I knew would nevah do sumfin’ like that. ‘M sorry, Paula, bu’ ah dun love you like that anymore. We can still be frien’s if you wan’.”

 

She sighed, a visible shiver going down her spine, “No, I think you’re right. We shouldn’ be around each other anymore. ‘S just too much. ‘M sorry for what I did and I’ll understand if you don’ forgive me.”

 

Stu chuckled and hugged her, “Ah forgive you, love.”

 

They sat there in an embrace for a while. He let her silently cry on his shoulder until no more tears fell. A moment passed where it felt like the entire universe went on pause, just for the two of them. Stu felt something almost bittersweet in the air as Paula pushed against his chest. He stood up, offering her a hand. She looked at Murdoc once she was back on her feet. 

 

“Hasn’t he been like that for almost a year now?”

 

Stu sighed, “Yeah, ‘s two weeks from Sunday.’M finkin’ of givin’ him up if he ain’ awake by then.”

 

Paula nodded, “Well, you oughta get home now. I’ll be happy to give you a lift if you want.”

 

“‘At’d be nice.”

 

She turned to the door, shoving her hand in her pockets, “Then come on. I’ve got somewhere to be at six.”

 

He nodded and grabbed Murdoc’s chair.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember when I said shit was gonna go down sometime soon? Yeah, this is that shit.  
> Side note: I have a small headcanon that Russel hates the Beatles, but Del loved them. Just a quirky thing between boyfriends.


	8. The Second Accident

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The winds have changed and every pawn is in place. The future is ready to become the present, even if a certain British man isn't.

Riding in the passenger’s seat of Paula’s car had always been a comfort to Stuart before. Now, it was just a reminder of everything. He could still feel the wrong taste in his mouth; Stu wanted it to just stop. He sat normally in his seat, but the air in the car felt stiff. It was like this was the last time they’d ever see each other. The silence was insufferable to Stu. He looked at the dashboard and spotted a familiar little hula girl.

 

“Hey, ah remember dat.”

 

Paula glanced at the little figure, a sad smile spreading on her face, “Me too. We went to your dad’s carnival for a little holiday an’ you spent fifteen pounds trying to win me a stuffed animal.”

 

“Eventually, the booth guys started feeling bad for me, so one of them let us pick something off the bottom shelf.”

 

“I didn’t like anything, so I let you pick her out for me,” Paula chuckled, “You know, I never told you this, but I think your dad fancied me.”

 

“No way. ‘E knew you were m’ girlfriend.”

 

“He did! He was poppin’ a boner half the time we were there.”

 

Stuart laughed, “Dat sounds like me old man, alright. He left me mum for a younger woman who wos only datin’ him ‘cos she thought he wos rich. She took off th’ instant she figured out he’s a carnival owner. Turns out, she was a hooker from Mexico. Actually, she looked a little like Murdoc.”

 

“Really?”

 

“Yeah. Same eyes an’ ‘air an’ all that.”

 

“That’s kinda spooky. Did you ever learn her name?”

 

“Ah dunno. Ah suppose it doesn’ mattah anyways.”

 

She hummed and sped up towards a stop light. Stuart grabbed the dash, “Paula, th’ light’s red!”

 

“No one’s coming.”

 

Stu relaxed for a second, then looked to the left to see an oncoming car. He barely had a chance to think about the seatbelt he hadn’t put on before Paula was swerving. Apparently, he forgot to hold on, as he went flying out the windshield. He thought about the seatbelt he hadn’t put on Murdoc as he soared into a Tesco parking lot. 

 

Like all things must, he eventually hit the ground again, but, unfortunately for Stuart, he hit the curb. He could feel his skull getting dented yet again on the side opposite his bad eye. Immediately, his entire head was filled with pain. It was worse than any headache he’d ever experienced in his life. He opened his mouth to scream, but the momentum from the crash made him keep going. His teeth were ripped out by the ruthless pavement as he was dragged another few meters. Finally, he slowed to an agonizing stop.

 

For two full minutes, Stu laid there, wondering if he was dead or not. He sure felt dead, but the aching pain from every joint in his body told him otherwise. He heard someone open a car door somewhere behind him and a loud groan. It wasn’t Paula’s voice, though. This one was deeper and kinda sounded like nails on a chalkboard. As the person behind him started grumbling, Stuart decided to see who it was. He made slow movements as he stood up, still all too familiar with the extreme pain in his head. It throbbed and blood poured down his face, but he pushed past it. 

 

He turned around to see a blurry Murdoc standing outside of Paula’s car. But that was impossible, he was still in a coma. Stuart stared at the figure, wondering when the hallucination would end. But, Murdoc was still standing there, staring right back. They stood like that for what felt like ages before Murdoc did a weird little half-smile. Stuart thought it was kind of cute. It lasted only a second before the other looked around and frowned. He turned back to Stuart, now looking confused.

 

“Hey, you, where the fuck am I? And what the fuck is wrong with your eyes?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that is all for this fic! I had a lot of fun making it and exploring who I am as a writer. There were some missed deadline and some point where I just wanted to scrap the entire thing, but overall, I'm glad I stuck with it. There may be a sequel if I can figure out how to write about Phase One without it being boring as fuck. 
> 
> Please leave a kudos if you haven't already and check out my other Gorillaz fic, One Goes Down. It's another role reversal AU, but it'll probably turn out a lot darker than this one. If you want to support me in a different way, check out my Tumblr (@geeky-pan). As always, have a great day!


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